𝐈𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧

“Impact of Parenting Styles on Children: Nature Determines the Parents We Get”

Over the years, I have had to learn from various scenarios of life.

Our realities of not having the opportunity to choose the type of parents we get is one of natures’ wonder, if I would put it that way. Let me share some of my thoughts on “Impact of Parenting Styles on Children: Nature Determines the Parents We Get”.

Nature gives us different kinds of parents, social class, and environment, and these define our upbringing. Many children have everything they ever wished for in their parents, some kids suffer in anguish and only have burning desires to enjoy a little bit of what they see other children enjoy, while many others strive to attain their wishes themselves, not depending on their parents.

I can’t help feeling emotional as I write, thinking about the environment I grew up in and some friends I met along life’s journey, and how parenting styles affected so many financially, emotionally, psychologically, and in many other ways.

I always think of parents as our Guardian Angels here on earth: they see to our daily well-being, care for us, provide for us to the best of their abilities at least up to the stage where we can care for ourselves, and should always be there as our backbones. I have met lots of people in life; some of them have various opinions of who parents are to them.

We all have a fair share of what we wish for if we were given the chance to choose who are parents will be. I am writing from experience and need to share my thoughts happily.

WHERE DOES YOURS FALL?

What type of parents did nature give you?

Intentional Parents

• The loving and caring set of parents who are financially, morally, inspirationally, and spiritually interested and ready to care for their children. No one has it all, and no one is perfect, but the effort and intentionality matter a lot. Intentional parents carry out their obligations diligently, and everyone wants and wishes for these kinds of parents

Caring but Struggling

• The caring but struggling parents who would do everything and anything to make their children happy but have limited resource to do much. Most parents under this category try their best to provide whatever they can for their children. They struggle to put their kids through school, no matter the circumstances, they struggle to put food on the table, they struggle to provide shelter, and they strive against all odds to provide various necessities. They put in their best so that their children can have a manageable life. A big thumbs up to those parents who struggle to carry out their parental duties diligently against all odds.

Parents who don’t prioritize their Children.

• The parents that don’t know how to set their priorities right: these kinds of parents care for their children but they lack the ability to set priorities.  Priorities like health care, feeding, tuition fees e.t.c before luxury. Some make the mistake of doing unnecessary things and then end up regretting when the important thing is needed. I witnessed a real-life scenario where a mother was given the tuition fee of her son; she used the money to buy clothes and hoped to get the money back later on but things didn’t work as planned and the child was sent out of school. This caused a very huge problem in the family. I was surprised, as I continued to wonder if the woman couldn’t hold on buying the cloth until she had the money for it. I have seen parents looking so good and well dress while their kids look unkept and uncared for. Setting priorities right is very important when raising kids.

Uncaring Parents

• The uncaring parents who don’t care about the welfare of their children, this is mostly one-sided and is common among men (especially in my country of origin). I am not trying to be gender biased, but I have seen a whole lot of families like this. Under this category, women in poor homes struggle alone to put food on the table, send the children to school, and provide for other necessities by selling foodstuffs or engaging in various kinds of small businesses, while the men wake up in the morning, go out, and make the gambling center or a beer parlor their works place.

Strict Parents

• The always strict parents can take happiness away from their home.  These are the kinds of parent who feel that it is only through being strict that their kids can be disciplined and well-behaved. Being strict is okay when it is necessary, at least the modern generation understands it. In an extreme case of being strict, it becomes wickedness, and most of the children with these kinds of parents end up being damaged in so many ways.

• This was the reality of most families in the poor environment where I grew up in West Africa. And in the rich homes, the men in this category feels like their only duty is to provide financially, every other thing concerning the household and children they had no business with them, the women are left to suffer alone raising the kids and managing the household. This is quite unfair. It is truly rare to see a women fall under this category, but it does occurs.

• The strict father and easy going mother kind of parents, this is rampant. I hear most people say “I can easily talk to my mother, but my dad is a no go area”.  Typical African parents….Smiles. Well, I personally have an earlier strict then later easy going father. I really don‘t consider this appropriate. I have seen real life situations were some kids are so afraid of the parents like they are monsters. Children really need to find friendship in their parents.

•  The strict mother and easy-going father kind of parents is rare. But I have witnessed it along life’s way. But as long as they care for their children, it shouldn’t be a problem.

• The very wrong set of parents with very wrong parenting skill. Here we have parents that show favoritism  amongst their children, showing favor to one child over another and making conspicuous. This tends to sprout up hatred amongst siblings. Then we have the careless parents that have little or no details about their children, and lots more.

Parenting

Parenting is a very important role that can shape the lives of children and help determine what they become in the society. This is because when a child is born into society, they start to learn from family first before going out into the world. Most children live by the principles they have acquired at home.

A child who grew up in a home of peace, quite, love, and togetherness will definitely act and behave differently from a child who grew up in a home of conflict, disagreements, fights, and violence.

If you are reading this and you are not yet a parent but hope to be one, I wish you would make a great decision to become an amazing parent to your children. Love, care, compassion, communication, endurance, patience, scolding when wrong, friendship, time, understanding, and togetherness are important tools of parenting.

Parenting is a full time job. When thinking about loving someone and getting married, parenting should also be part of the important things to consider and working hard to be the best parent to your children should be an intentional act.

Parents should be willing to spend time with the children, family time is really important. Also, training the child(ren) morally, mentally, etc. Watch and monitor characters, behaviours, likes, addictions, actions, of children. Parents should be ready to teach and learn as well along the journey. We all want better raised and trained kids in the world.

Children don‘t get the privilege of picking who they want as parents, it is an involuntary choice made for them by nature, but I think as we grow older to become parents, we should strive to be parents our kids will be grateful to have.

Check out this article: https://chidinmainspired.com/superheroes-are-real-and-i-see-them-everyday/